Dear... Me

As I sit here on my lunch break at work; another somewhat stressful day or one that makes me think I wish I would've made a different choice recently... I try not to regret anything or dwell on the "what ifs".  I think about this song (Words I would Say... See bottom of blog) and think about my earlier years that I all too often forget.  If you know me *cough GARRETT* you know how easily I let things get to me.  I try to brush them off, but sometimes it is hard.  Thank you handsome for being a rock when I need you and for making me laugh and smile when it is needed.

My hope is that one day my sweet daughters will read this and know that I have been in their shoes along the way and that they really take this to heart.  As a child we are carefree, without worry, happy, and just have this vulnerability and innocence about us.

I need to constantly remind myself of this verse each day:
“Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." -Matthew 18:1-3.

As we get older, we tend to lose this child-like mentality and gain this sense of entitlement or feel like we have to prove something.  As an adult it is okay to still be somewhat vulnerable and innocent.  Yes, we do gain more responsibility and have to work for those things we want and there is nothing wrong with that.  That is expected.  But, we do also need to remember to be thankful for those things we do have and for those moments that do make us so very happy!  Today, my biggest blessings are my family.  Here are three especially great blessings in my life:

My sweet Grace Lynn - 5mos old

Grace Lynn - 2yrs old

My loving Scarlett Lily - 3mos old

Scarlett Lily - 6mos old

Our girls' amazing daddy, my husband, Garrett

Family LOVE <3

My Soul-mate!!

That smile on my face is no accident.  Grace Lynn, Scarlett Lily, and Garrett make every day worth every minute and I can't help but smile with each of them.  My hope is that my girls grow up to be the strong God-fearing, kind-hearted, sweet girls that they are today.  And, Garrett has been nothing short of a blessing each day acting as a strong-hold for our family and being a Christ-like example for his daughters to find in their future soul-mates also.  So here goes... A LETTER TO ME!

Dear Me,

There are going to be times growing up (particularly in high-school and some college days) when you may feel like an outcast or feel like you aren't really going anywhere in life.  You think you will end up as an un-married 50-year-old cat-lady (nothing wrong with that, but it's not you).  I know you want children, want a family, want to be happy with work, etc.  These are normal aspirations, but as you get older and maybe feel like this day will never come, do not lose sight of what really should be on your mind the whole time... Jesus and just following His will.  I know you are not a rebel child or trouble maker, etc, but I also know you have a hard time just "letting go and letting God".  You like to do things for yourself and often it results in unhappiness, stress (especially stress), etc.  Once you finally start getting back to your younger mentality and just began enjoying those things that truly made you happy and not worry about those things you cannot change, amazing things will happen.

Ultimately you will meet the love of your life and really fall in love.  Unfortunately you do lose your first real job with a hard economy (but after remembering to Let God, you will find another great job), you will have some hard times there also, but just remember to always LET GOD! and trust in Him.  You will get married to that love of your life, Garrett, and you will be blessed with your first child, Grace, and shortly thereafter, your second child, Scarlett.  What's more incredible is that you will get pregnant with your second child without TOM visiting in more than 2 years... You will know what that means ;)  It is pretty incredible how making Jesus the center of everything, making Him YOUR everything, really does result in amazing things in life.  Scarlett and Grace really are miracle little girls.  Remember what you went through for each of them and how blessed you are that they are here today.  We are not promised easy times; in fact it's quite the opposite.  We will have hard times and will have struggles, but with Jesus, these times are made easier and we do get through them.

Today, I thank God everyday for my family that has raised me then and continue to guide me today (Mama, Daddy, and your sweet sister that you can always count on, Amanda).  They were and still are a huge part of what makes you who you are today.  I also thank God for your own family (husband and daughters), my friends, our home, among many other things.  Remember to always thank God for all these things... time goes way too fast and you really are a blessed God's Girl!

I know some of your favorite things growing up and will still be when you reach my age today are:

• Sunshowers
• Sunflowers
• Rainbows
• Bubble Baths
• Disney days
• Concrete roads (strange maybe, but I know you love the noise they make when you drive over them and you will still love them when you are me now)
• Your first real and best friend (then and now)
• Old friends and new friends (every person comes into your life for a reason and a season; each one has been such a blessing; some will even stayed with you through all seasons)
• and many many others things... the list could go on...

Sunflowers at our wedding

Rainbow over our home

Still do love bubble baths

Disney day with Dale

Stephanie and I; Best friends to this day!

Shaving cream parties with friends then

Baby showers with friends today

As I end this letter; remember no matter what you may or may not be going through today, always keep Jesus close and make Him your everything.  Also, DON'T WORRY!!  Nothing good can come of worrying.  Thank your mama for drilling this in your head as much as you drive her crazy with the worrying... You, even at 30, are still growing, but try to remember her advice and also to always remember your favorite verse, Philippians 4:6-7.

This song is absolutely perfect for you and your sweet girls to come, Grace and Scarlett.

"Words I Would Say" by the Sidewalk Prophets.

It's Three in the morning
and I'm still awake
so I picked up a pen and a page.
And I started writing 
just what I'd say
if we were face to face

I'd tell you just what you mean to me
Tell you these simple truths

Be strong in the Lord and
never give up hope.
You're gonna do great things
I already know
God's got his hand on you so 
don't live life in fear
forgive and forget
but don't forget why you're here
Take your time and pray
These are the words I would say

Last time we spoke
you said you were hurting
and I felt your pain in my heart
I want you to know
that I keep on praying
Love will find you where you are

I know 'cause I've already been there
So just hear these simple truths

Be strong in the Lord and
never give up hope.
You're gonna do great things
I already know
God's got his hand on you so 
don't live life in fear
forgive and forget
but don't forget why you're here
Take your time and pray
These are the words I would say

From one simple life to another
I will say
Come find peace in the Father

Be strong in the Lord and
never give up hope.
You're gonna do great things
I already know
God's got his hand on you so 
don't live life in fear
forgive and forget
but don't forget why you're here
Take your time and pray
Thank God for each day
His love will find a way
These are the words I would say.

Love,
Me